A Message for Moms
A few weeks ago I received a gracious invitation to share a message of encouragement at the TAPP (Teenage Parent Program) Christmas Party. It’s an annual party put on by our church to give the young moms a special time before Christmas break. To me, high schoolers are more intimidating than adults...I think it’s because most of my memories from that age are not that fantastic, and it just takes you back there so quick!
As soon as I began speaking, the script I had prepared went straight out the window - they were so rambunctious and overstimulated by everything going on that I knew I had a brief moment if not seconds before I would lose them completely! I’m praying that the words I did get out connected or encouraged them in some way, and since I had this prepare I figured I would share it in case there is just one mom out there who needs to hear these words. Every one of you deserves to be celebrated and reminded that you have more worth and value than you realize! ❤️
Today is a day all about YOU. A chance for you to try and forget about all the things weighing you down or stressing you out or keeping you up at night. I know that you don’t know me, and I don’t know you, but just by being moms, we share so much in common. Becoming a mom is one of the few things in life that makes you feel just about every emotion that has ever existed. Today alone within the first 10 minutes of being awake, I felt:
• Proud that my daughter woke up on her own
• Anxious because I couldn’t remember if I’d actually moved the Elf or not before she came downstairs
• Happy that she wasn’t grumbling about being tired
• Panic because I realized she hasn’t had a bath in three days
• Grateful that my son was still asleep
• Frustrated that Amelia couldn’t find any matching socks in her dresser
• Annoyed that I had to go back upstairs to help her search
• Loved by Amelia because finding a pair of socks was apparently the most amazing thing I’ve ever done for her as a mom
• Guilt because I couldn’t make it to the Christmas party in her class today because I had a meeting
• Doubt in my ability to actually raise children who will become functioning adults
All of that happened in five minutes. While they are all frivolous and probably shallow things to spend time worrying about, they seemed real and valid in the moment. Motherhood is HARD! What is hard for me might look SO different than what is hard for you. But we share the theme that it is HARD.
I want to challenge you to surround yourself with people who believe in you. Friends who are telling reminding you of your worth and of your value. Friends who will be there when you’ve fallen down and love you in spite of it. I can promise you that even as an adult, friendships like that don’t come easy. It takes being intentional and it takes hard work, but it is so, so worth it.
I would imagine that when you welcomed your child into this world, you discovered an incredible strength within you that you never knew before. And as you’ve learned to care for your child and give them love, I hope you’ve also learned how to receive love as well.
When we become mothers, something shifts within us and we redefine what is actually important in our lives. The very definition of importance is having meaning. Two years ago, I’m willing to bet that the things that seemed important then probably don’t hold the same weight or value today.
Education is important to you, maybe more so then before, and you’re proving that by making it a priority to come to school. Your child, is important. And I can promise you that your child thinks YOU are most important. Your child needs to see you BELIEVING that you are important. That you can succeed. That your life has value and purpose.
Think about the things that you say to your child every day – you are beautiful, you are handsome, good job, you are so smart, I’m so proud of you…..there are so many more. Now think about those specific words of positivity and ask yourself when the last time you said something that kind to YOURSELF.
When you take a ride on an airplane, before the plane takes off, the stewardess reminds us that if you’re traveling with a child and there is distress, always put your own oxygen mask on before assisting your child. Now as a mom, that goes against how we are wired. We always put our children first, right? But what were to happen if you didn’t put your own mask on first, and by the time you got your child’s mask on, it was too late? Take care of yourself. Never feel bad about making self-care a priority. Say the kind words to yourself. And then believe them!
Being a mother will teach you more about yourself than you probably could have ever expected. You’ll work harder than you ever have. You’ll prove not only to yourself but to all the people watching that you are strong and you are capable.
Today, we are celebrating you with the hope and the expectation that you will believe that you ARE worth celebrating. Believe that your life has value and purpose, and your children will believe that for themselves as well.
So, remember: you are important. We are cheering for you. We believe in you. Today is about YOU, so enjoy!